Digested week: Forget the climate crisis –
re-election is Sunak’s only burning issue
John Crace
Plus, my plan to live for ever by standing on one leg,
and Nigel Farage lives his best life despite debanking ‘shame’
Fri 28 Jul
2023 16.27 BST
Monday
You would
have thought the sight of wildfires in many parts of southern Europe would have
given Rishi Sunak pause for thought. Instead it has inspired his pyromaniac
tendencies. After the byelection in Uxbridge last week, which Labour lost
principally because of Sadiq Khan’s ultra-low emission zone policy, Sunak has
declared a binfire of the Tories’ green agenda. He had never really believed in
it – despite most of the country supporting climate crisis measures – and had
now declared it to be just a woke indulgence. Another arm of the culture wars.
So all
weekend No 10 has been briefing that the government has had second thoughts
about its environmental agenda and today, on a visit to Birmingham, the prime
minister said the government was committed to doing the bare minimum. Or to
keep its response to climate breakdown “proportionate and pragmatic”. Make that
disproportionate and unpragmatic. If Sunak was really engaged with the issues
he would be doing more, not less. Instead, he merely shrugs his shoulders,
observes that the weather is vaguely tolerable in the UK, and lets those
countries most affected do the heavy lifting.
Sunak no
longer even seems indifferent to 2030 and 2050 targets. They were just dates
picked at random to him. It doesn’t matter if we delay things by a few years.
What happens in the rest of the world isn’t the UK’s problem. If large parts of
the world are flooded, Rishi will just go on holiday elsewhere. He doesn’t even
care that doing too little is a waste of money as the planet will be trashed if
insufficient action is taken. Still, must stick to his priorities. Getting the
Tories re-elected in 2024 is far more important than making sure the world
survives for future generations.
Tuesday
Last week
my wife was taking our dog for a walk around Tooting Common when she noticed he
was limping. On her return we examined Herbie but couldn’t spot anything wrong
– no grass seed in a paw – and he didn’t appear to be in any pain. But to be on
the safe side, I took him to the vet. He initially appeared to be just as
confused until he examined Herbie’s knee. Whereupon he pronounced that Herbie
had torn his cruciate ligament – how often does a13-year-old dog get an elite
athlete’s injury? – and would need an operation. Would it be expensive? It
would. About £3,500.
Needless to
say we don’t have any pet insurance. But no matter. What Herbie needs, Herbie
gets. He is by far the most loved member of the family. If I needed another
knee operation, my wife would happily put me on an 18-month waiting list. Or
however long Sunak and Steve Barclay have now decided is an acceptable delay.
My wife is also far more worried about Herbie’s wellbeing than she ever was
about me when I had a total knee replacement about 12 years ago.
Still, I
know my place. We’d be a dead cert to win the dog that looks most like its
owner at the Tooting dog show this year. Jill is especially worried about how
Herbie will cope with six weeks enforced crate rest post op. He hates being
cooped up. I guess he will just have to get used to it. While he waits for his
op, Herbie has proved remarkably adaptable. He now gets around quite easily on
three legs, would chase balls if allowed, and can even climb on to the bed.
Best of all he has even learned how to have a piss without falling over.
Wednesday
Earlier
this year I read somewhere that people who could stand on one leg for more than
10 seconds had a much better life expectancy than those who toppled over
immediately. Since then I’ve spent a lot of down time – especially when in a
queue or brushing my teeth – improving my balance. Anything to claw back a few
extra years. I live in hope that if I spend the rest of my life on one leg then
I may never die. But then I’m a sucker for life hacks and have taken to heart
research published this week by the US Department of Veterans Affairs that has
identified eight lifestyle choices that could add more than 20 years to your
life. Believe me, when you’re in your late 60s, you fall on this kind of thing.
I may even live to see Spurs win a Premier League title at this rate. Though I
doubt it. More likely I will live to see yet more disappointment.
The first
rule is to eat well. I reckon I’m halfway there. I eat less red meat than I
used to but I could always eat less. The second is to avoid cigarettes.
Something I’ve done for 35 years. That must count for something. Get a good
night’s sleep. Hmm. I sleep OK but I could do without the constant anxiety
dreams. I wake up every morning in a terrible state. Be physically active. Job
done. I do an hour on the cross trainer three or four times a week. Manage
stress. That’s a major fail. I’m hopeless at it. Stress manages me. Avoid binge
drinking. Tick. Haven’t touched alcohol for nearly 40 years. Be free from
opioid addiction. Yup. And I’ve even had an opioid addiction in the past to be
free from. So that must count double. Lastly, have positive social
relationships. I’d give that a yes, too. I love my family and friends. We might
also add in doing the plank, which someone else this week declared would make
you live longer. I do it in the gym for two and a half minutes. Perhaps I
should work on doing it on one leg.
Thursday
England
cricketers play football in the rain at Old Trafford
‘Might as
well take up a sport that does play in the rain’: some of the England
cricketers at Old Trafford. Photograph: Barry Mitchell/Shutterstock
The weather
forecast was spot on. It had promised rain for much of last Saturday and Sunday
in Manchester and rain was what we got. So the fourth Test petered out into a
tame draw and Australia got to retain the Ashes because they had won them last
time. Fair play to the Aussies then. They might not be the most charismatic
team but they got the job done. At key moments in the first two Tests they
played the smarter cricket. England had their chances and didn’t take them.
But it
often feels as if those responsible for running cricket are their own worst
enemy. I can’t think of any other sport that would willingly allow one of the
most anticipated and exciting series in years to be decided by the weather. You
can’t imagine – back in the day, when Centre Court didn’t have a roof – for
Wimbledon to just shrug its shoulders if it rained on finals weekend. Oh never mind!
No need to play the last matches, we’ll just give the trophies to the players
who won it last time. Or if Fifa had decided it was too hot to play the World
Cup final in Qatar and had just decided Argentina and France could share the
title.
I mean, how
hard would it have been for the International Cricket Council and the England
and Wales Cricket Board to have just scheduled a reserve day in case of a
washout? They managed to do that for the final of the Test championship between
Australia and India earlier in the year. Far better to play every match to a
natural conclusion. Who knows, the Australians Mitch Marsh and Cameron Green
could have made heroes of themselves by batting all day at Old Trafford and
preventing an England win. There again, the cricket authorities have form for
stupidity. I’ve lost count of the number of times play has ended at 6.30pm in
full sunlight when there are still about 10 overs still to be bowled. Sooner or
later, fans will get fed up being taken for mugs. On to the Oval today.
Friday
Nigel
Farage gives every impression of living his best life. The establishment man
through and through with his own show on GB News and friend of half the
Conservative party and the UK press gets to indulge his anti-establishment
fantasies. Someone who craves attention is front-page news for much of the last
four weeks. And, even better, has for the first time in his life claimed the
moral high ground. Who can now demand revenge by demanding the resignation of
the NatWest and Coutts CEOs.
Farage says
he feels shame and embarrassment at being debanked, but gives precious little
sign of it. He looks like he’s loving every minute. The trademark smirk has
never been broader. Though a word to the Nige. If you don’t want to lose your
bank account again, then maybe go to a high street bank rather than a posh
private bank that can make up its own rules. Just a thought. And a word to
Alison Rose, the former NatWest CEO: if you are going to brief the BBC’s
business editor in future, you might want to check that the story you are
giving him is accurate.
But Farage
is just doing what Farage has always done. More curious is the way that senior
Tory politicians – from Rishi Sunak down – have joined in the clamour to get
Rose and the Coutts boss fired. Sunak has not called for heads as water bosses
pump sewage into rivers and streams. But for l’affaire Farage, Sunak pulls out
all the stops. The Brexit elite looking after one another. Jobs for the boys.
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